Captain N: Re-Edited Episode 2: How's Bayou

 It's been a month since Mother Brains defeat at the hands of the newly fomed N-Team. Since then,many Video Worlds have been liberated from Mother Brain's rule,all thanks to oul heroes. However the evil one regouped and eventually recruted a new member to her team,The Evil Dr. Wiley. Now She's leady for her revenge. Within her lair on the sinister world of Metroid, Mother Brain is listening at her computer to some audio her spy bots picked up earier.

Kevin's Voice: (talking to lana) ....but by far the worst vacation me and my Family went on was to the Bayou's of Louisiana when I was 8,man that was a nightmare. The bugs,the snakes,the gators..not to mention the funky smell. Plus,I got lost in it for a few hours. I was really scared. Yeah,the Bayou is one area I would never want to visit again.

Lana's Voice: That's horrible.

Mother Brain: That's it! I've found Captain N's weak spot!
 
King Hippo: Uh,he's weak against Audio Transmitions?
 
Mother Brain: No,blubber-brain ! The Bayou! He doesn't know his way around the Bayou!
  
King Hippo scratched his head.
 
Mother Brain: And I think I know which Bayou to send him. I'll need a remote-controlled robo-cat.
 
Eggplant Wizard: Ooh, Ooh,How about a radio-controlled sweet potato,instead?

Eggy made one appear, and it flew off.
  
Mother Brain: That's very thoughtful of you (picks up the Eggplant Wizard). But do you know what I'd really like, Eggplant Wizard?
 
Eggplant Wizard: Uh, what's that, Mother Brain?
  
Mother Brain grabbed the sweet potato and held it up to him. "

Mother Brain: An eggplant slicer!

Eggy cried when the potato splattered on him.
 
Mother Brain: Now tell Dr.Wiley to make me a robo-cat!

An hour later.....

Dr.Wiley: It's tuned to your brainwaves, Mother Brain. Just think a - " wheeze " - thought, and the robo-cat will respond.
  
Dr.Wiley looked exactly like a 4-fingered midget version of his 'Mega Man 1' manual art counterpart.

Mother Brain: (intrigued). Hmm,...let's see.
  
The cat's eyes glowed, and the cat made a robotic "meow" sound. It faced the others. The others were all shaking with fear. The cat jumped on the Eggplant Wizard.
 
Mother Brain: I'd say that the test run went purrrfectly.Okay, little robo-cat, go into the warp zone and do your stuff.
  
The cat ran into a warp zone.

At the Palace of Power, Mother Brain's sinister plot begins to unfold. In the Dancing room in the Palace, Kevin turned on a music machine. Some cool-sounding music began playing.
 
Lana: I'm not sure I can do this, Kevin.
  
Kevin walked back over to her. "

Kevin: Of course you can, Princess. Dancing is easy. Here, I'll show you.

Kevin started dancing and spinning. Lana smiled. She started dancing.
  
Kevin: I've got some pretty cool power moves, too.
  
Kevin pressed a button on his Power Pad. He walked backwards in the air and then backwards to where Lana was. He landed back on the floor.
 
Kevin: Say, why don't we go back to my world? My friends would hyperventilate if they saw me dancing with a real princess.
 
Lana: (laughs) Some other time, Kevin. I've got too many responsibilities here.
 
Suddenly, the robo-cat ran in and jumped on Kevin's head. He fell forward, but was still standing. Kevin yelled. He stood up straight. Duke ran in under Kevin, knocking him back.
  
Kevin fell to the floor.

Kevin: Whoa! Duke, will you stop chasing things?!
 
Lana walked over to him, knelt down, and placed her hands on him.
 
Kevin: He's been getting me in trouble doing that ever since he was a pup. Sorry if I upset your cat.

Lana leaned in closer to him.

Lana: But, I don't have a cat.
  
They both got to their feet and ran after Duke and the cat.
 
Duke, come back here!" Kevin yelled.
  
A lid rose on a wall in the corridor, revealing a blue warp zone. The cat jumped into the warp. Duke followed.
 
Kevin: (shouting) Duke, no!
  
Duke entered the warp. Kevin and Lana stopped in front of the warp.
 
Kevin: Where does this warp zone go to?

Lana: Bayouland.

Kevin: A Bayou?! Oh, that mutt of mine would have to pick the worst place in the universe to chase a stupid cat! Stay cool, I'll be right back.

Kevin jumped into the warp. A warp opened inside a tree in the bayou. Kevin came out.

Kevin: (calling out) Dukey! Here, boy! 
   
Kevin climbed out of the tree and began searching.

On Metroid, Mother Brain was watching Kevin walk around on her mirror (via spy bot).

Mother Brain: He's taken the bait! King Hippo, Eggplant Wizard, take the warp to Bayouland...and make sure Captain N never comes out of the swamp. Heh,heh,heh!  
   
Eggplant Wizard and King Hippo walked up to two small warp zones in a wall. King Hippo bent over and groaned as he tried to push himself into the warp zone on the right. Finally, he stood up and faced Eggy.

King Hippo: Aw, it's no use. I'll never fit into this pipe. 
   
Eggplant Wizard: Nonsense. All you need is a little lubrication.(waving his hands) Lettuce is green. Tomatoes are red. Turn King Hippo into a salad head. 
   
King Hippo's boxer shorts turned into lettuce. Tomatoes plugged his ears. His crown turned into a mushroom.
   
King Hippo: (upset) Hey! This ain't lubrication! 
   
Eggplant Wiz:  Into the pipe without any toil. Abra-kadabra, vinegar and oil! 
   
The bottles appeared in the Eggplant Wizard's hands. He went over to King Hippo.
 
King Hippo: (angry) Ooh, I'll toss your salad. Eggy covered him with vinegar and oil. Hippo chased Eggy around in circles.

King Hippo: Ooh, wait'll I get my hands on you! 

King Hippo followed Eggplant Wizard through the pipe on the right.

At the Palace, Lana and Simon were in the Conference room, monitoring Bayouland on the satellite monitor.

Lana: I'm worried about Kevin. He should've been back hours ago. No one but Bayou Billy could survive that long in the swamp.
   
Simon: (amused) Oh, he's probably just feeding the alligators...with himself. 
   
Lana sighed. Mega Man and Pit Icarus came into the room.

Mega Man: Princess, look what we found! It's a robo-cat! I caught it trying to sneak out of the warp zone!

Lana: Dr. Wiley's the only one who could create something evil looking like this. We'd better warn Kevin that something's up. Simon. We're going to Bayouland. 

Simon: And risk my neck for that kid? I'm sorry, but Simon Belmont, the vampire hunter, never rescues those he doesn't like. 

 Lana: Not even for your Princess? 
   
Simon: (smile) Well, maybe, if you promise to have dinner with me tonight."
   
Lana: (sigh,smile) if you insist. 
   
Everyone gathered at the warp.
 
Lana: Pit, Mega Man, stay here and look after the Palace. Come on, Simon! 

Simon: After you, Your Wonderfulness. 
   
Lana crawled into the warp. Simon followed her. The door slid down over the warp. Lana and Simon warped in under the same tree.
   
Lana: Ooh. This bayou is creepy. 
   
They got out from under the tree.

 Lana: (called out) Kevin! (points) Let's try this way. 
 Duke was walking around the bayou. Eyes looked at him from the bushes. He ran to a log, and a spider walked forward. It jumped on his nose. Duke shook his head to get the spider off. He ran somewhere else. Kevin was walking around in the swamp.

Kevin: Duke! Where are ya, boy?! (walks over to a tree's root and sits down on it, placing his head in his hands) Duke, you can't be gone. I don't wanna live a life without you. You're the best friend I've got in the world. (lifts his head and looks around) Especially this one.
   
Suddenly, another root tried to grab him. Kevin ran from the live tree but stopped in front of another one. It grabbed him and lifted him up.

Kevin: Hey! Let go! 
 
Kevin draws his Zapper and shoots the tree's arm. He falls into the swamp and runs. He stops at another tree that tried to grab him. Kevin used his Power Pad to jump the tree.

Kevin: Whoa! It's a good thing I'm good with the Power Pad, or I would've been in deep...quicksand!
   
Kevin sank through the quicksand and fell into a cave, screaming. He landed on the cave's floor. He stood up.

Kevin: Phew. For a minute there I could've sworn I was - " (hears growling) - Dead meat!"

Kevin yelled when he spotted an alligator. Kevin fell back into a sitting position. He gasped, and the alligator advanced, growling. Kevin tried to use his Pause button. Nothing happened.

Kevin: Oh, great! The quicksand's drained my power! (tries to back away) I seriously, seriously hate the Bayou, I just don't have what it takes to survive.

Kevin was backed up against a rock. The alligator prepared to bite him. Suddenly, a pair of hands closed the alligator's mouth shut.

Man: Hey! That there's no way to treat a friendly caller. 
   
Kevin stood up.

Kevin: Thanks for the save. 

Man: I didn't save you,kid. I saved him. He gets awful indigestion from eatin' humans. Heh, heh.(lets go, and the alligator burps. He gets off of the gator) Keeps me up all night. 
   
The man walked over to his truck.

Kevin: Hey! You're Bayou Billy! 
   
Billy got into his truck.

Billy: Uh, huh. Must be.

Billy closed the door and began to turn the ignition.

Kevin: Wait! I need your help! 

Billy: Ifin' y'all are lost, uh,(points) the warp out of this here bayou is right past them trees.

Kevin: I know. I just came from there. I lost my dog, and you're the greatest tracker in the bayou. Without your help, I'll never find him.
 
Billy: Dog? Well, why didn't you say so? Hop in. 

Kevin got in the passenger side of the truck.

Billy: I know what it's like to be attached to your pet.

Billy turned his head and whistled. The alligator walked onto the back of the truck and stuck its head into the window. Kevin gasped.

Billy: This here's my pet alligator, Loafer. Aw-haw, looky there. He likes ya."

Kevin: Oh, just what I need. 

Billy started up his truck, and they sped off.

Billy: Now don't you fret none, kid. When Bayou Billy's done teachin' ya, you'll be able to track down the mosquitos.
 
A short while later, Billy and Kevin were above ground again.

Billy: Now, first thing ya gotta learn about trackin' in the bayou is that footprints don't float. So you gotta look for other signs, like these here broken tulips. Your dog was here, mmm,...I'd say about an hour ago. 

Kevin: Well, then we've got to hurry! 
   
Billy grabbed Kevin.

Billy: Hey! Not so fast,boy! Lesson number two: Never travel in the bayou without first getting some supplies.
    
Billy walked over to a tree and got a whip out from under it.

Billy: Now, you're gonna have to learn to use a whip if you wanna survive out here. (throws it to Kevin) Try it out. 
   
Kevin walked over to a branch and tried whipping it. He hit himself in the butt.

Billy: Uh, huh! Not bad. You hit a movin' target. 
   
Suddenly, a buzzard flew toward them.

Kevin: Billy! Look out! 
   
The buzzard swooped down. Billy ducked.

Billy: Let me show you how we do it in the bayou.

Billy walked over to Kevin and took the whip. He pushed Kevin away.

Billy: All right, you metallic buzzard! Gimme your best move! 

The buzzard flew forward. Billy whipped it, and it broke into pieces.

Billy: See? Nothin' to it. 
   
Just then, a big frog-creature came out of the swamp. Billy and Kevin backed away, shocked. It advanced on them. Kevin jumped back with his Power Pad just before getting hit. He landed by Billy.

Kevin: Phew. Good thing I've got my Power Pad.

Billy: Jumpin' won't do you no good against Frog Guy. 

Kevin: Why not? 
   
The Frog Guy jumped close to them.

Billy: That's why. (holds out the whip to Kevin) Try this. You gotta learn sometime. 
   
Kevin took the whip. He whipped at the Frog Guy, missed, and the whip wrapped around a tree branch. The Frog Guy advanced.

Kevin: (yells) Help! 

Billy: You're doin' just fine, kid. 
   
Kevin pulled on the whip. The branch broke and landed on the Frog Man's head. The Frog Man fell over, then jumped away. Bayou Billy laughed.

Billy: Nice move, kid! Nice move!

He shoved Kevin forward a bit.

Kevin: Thanks. Can we go find Duke now?

Billy: Don't rush it, kid. You still gotta learn about this here bayou.

Billy jumped on some rocks to the other side of the swamp. He motioned for Kevin to do the same. Kevin started jumping on rocks, but he landed on an alligator. It rose, and Kevin almost fell into the swamp. Billy caught him.

An hour later,Billy was cooking something in a pot. He offered Kevin to have some. Kevin took his spoon and got a little skeleton on the spoon. The skeleton raised its arms. Kevin fainted. Later,Billy knocked on a tree. A hand gave him a first-aid kit. A bird swooped down. Kevin whipped it. soon after,Kevin and Billy were walking in the swamp. A snake dropped in and swam up to them. Kevin grabbed it and pulled it apart.

Billy is sailing his motorboat through the swamp.

Billy: Looks like you're gonna make one jim-dandy swampsman.

Billy stopped the boat at the shore.

Kevin: Well, come on, Billy. We gotta find Duke now. 

Billy: Sorry, kid. I can't come with you. Gotta rustle up some poachers. But you'll do fine on your own,...Bayou Kevin."

Billy gave Kevin a hard slap on the back to get him out of the boat, then sailed off.
 
Mother Brain was watching Kevin wave to Billy (via spy bot). She laughed.

Mother Brain: So, Bayou Billy thinks he's taught him everything there is to know about the swamp, does he? Well, we'll see if Captain N can handle my little swamp creature. Is it ready, Dr. Wiley?

Dr.Wiley: (working on a covered monster on a slab) Any second now, Mother Brain. 
   
Lightning struck and it flowed into the covered creature. The creature rose.

Mother Brain: Oh, it's so horrible! Only a Mother Brain could love it. I love it!

Dr. Wiley: It's genetically programmed for only one - " wheeze " - purpose - to destroy The N-Team! (to the creature) Into the bayou warp!

The creature ran towards the warp zone and disappeared in a flash of light. In the swamp, the creature rose from the water saying "Captain N!!!"

In the deadly swamp of Bayouland, Princess Lana and Simon Belmont continue their search for Kevin.

Lana: (calling) Kevin! Can you hear me?! (speaking) I think something horrible has happened to him.

Simon: (sarcastically) Oh, dear me. You really think so? How dreadful.
   
As they left the swamp, the Swamp Creature came out of the water. Elsewhere, Duke swam out of the swamp. He shook himself off and barked. He saw a snake. The snake tried to strike, but Duke avoided it. He bit the snake by the tail and threw it. Kevin arrived at the spot later and saw the prints.

Kevin: (worried) Oh, no. Duke tangled with a snake. Oh, I hope he's okay. Duke, here boy.
 
Back at the swamp, Eggplant Wizard was searching around.

Eggplant Wiz: There's nothing around here. Do you see anything, King Hippo? 
   
King Hippo walked out of the swamp. Eggplant Wizard was on his shoulders.

King Hippo: Naw, there's nothin' under the water. Let's check that way."

Hippo drops Eggy, causing him to cry out...vegetables also pop out of him. Soon,they found a poorly-disguised boat.

Eggplant Wiz: Look. An airboat.
   
King Hippo jumped into it. It broke in half.

Hippo: (annoyed) Aw, we won't get anywhere in this piece of junk. 

Eggplant: I've got an idea.

A moment later...

Hippo: (annoyed) This is the stupidest idea you ever dreamed up!

The motor and seat were attached to him, and he was floating in the water. The Eggplant Wizard was sitting on the hippo boat.

Eggplant: If we don't take care of Captain N, Mother Brain will brain us. Here goes nothin'.

Eggy started the engine They took off in the swamp.

Eggplant: Hey! This is terrific! 

Hippo: (yelling) Look out! 
   
They missed a rock.

Eggplant: Hah! Missed it.

They hit a tree.

Hippo: (angry) I'm gonna scramble your eggplant when I get my gloves on you!"
   
Eggplant Wizard: (points) Look! There he is. 
   
Kevin walked into the swamp. Eggplant Wizard drove at Kevin laughing.  

Kevin: (called out) Duke!

Kevin sees the minions and dove out of the way. He came up from the water.  He saw an alligator.

Kevin: Sorry I don't have time to stay for supper.

Kevin used his Power Pad to jump. He grabbed a vine, landed on the alligator's back, and swung the vine into the mouth for "handles".

Kevin: An alligator jet-ski. Far-out!"

He pressed a button and took off.

Eggy: (yell) He's gettin' away!  .
   
Kevin jumped over a log. King Hippo went through it and screamed. They went through some high grass. Kevin then jumped over a blue snake. King Hippo hit it. Kevin steered around a rock. The others hit it. Eggplant Wizard and the steering wheel flew through the air. King Hippo flew through the air. The motor flew through the air. The seat flew through the air. Kevin rode away.

Meanwhile on Metroid, Mother Brain watches as the Swamp Creature chases Simon and Lana. Simon pushed Lana behind him and took the lead.

Mother Brain: (with evil glee) Ooh. What a delightful surprise. My Swamp Creature is not only going to devour Captain N, but the Princess and Simon Belmont as well.

Simon and Lana came out of the swamp.

Lana: There's a warp zone just ahead 
   
They gasped. King Hippo and Eggplant Wizard came out of the tree.

Hippo: Ha, ha. You're not gettin' away that easy. 

Eggy: (laughing) You wouldn't want our slimy friend to miss his lunch, would you?" 

The creature advanced on them, roaring. King Hippo grabbed Simon, and Eggplant Wizard grabbed Lana. They tried to escape, but couldn't. The Swamp Creature advanced on them more. Kevin, standing on a tree, tried to zap it twice, but missed. The creature dove. They were dragged off. Kevin jumped down to the ground. He looked around. Kevin scratched his head with his Zapper and walked forward.

Kevin: Let 'em go, or there's gonna be french fried eggplant and hippo burgers for everybody. 

Eggplant Wizard jumped out behind Kevin and made a vine appear, which tied Kevin up.

Kevin: Hey!

Kevin walked over to Simon and Lana, who were also tied up.

Kevin: So,what are you guys doing here?"

Lana: We came to tell you that it was a trap. But I guess you could've figured that out without us. 

Lana looked away upset as The creature prepared to move in for the kill. Suddenly,Billy drove in between them.

Kevin: Billy! 
   
The creature pulled the truck towards the swamp, then ripped the top off the truck and chewed on it.

Billy: (smiles) Hey, kid! I found your mutt! 
   
Duke barked and jumped out of the truck, followed by Billy. Duke ran to Kevin.

Kevin: Duke! You're okay!
   
Duke barked and pulled the vines off Kevin.

Hippo: Don't let 'em get away. 
   
Billy jumped in front of him.

Billy: If I were you, I'd be worried about myself."

Kevin: Good boy, Duke. Now, untie the others. 
   
The creature was standing on a log. Kevin walked over and aimed, but the creature splashed water at Kevin, short-circuiting his Zapper.

Kevin: Oh, great, my Zapper's got swamp duct in it. 
 
Eggplant Wizard was throwing vegetables at Bayou Billy. Billy stopped them all with his whip. Billy turned and looked at Kevin.

Billy: Forget the Zapper. Get the Crash Star!"

Kevin: But I can't. The Swamp Creature's blocking it. 
   
The star was behind the creature in a tree's knothole.

Billy: Sure you can, kid. Just remember what I taught ya. 

Kevin jumped and grabbed a branch. He swung forward and onto Billy's truck. A group of alligators swam in front of him. He jumped on their heads and then grabbed a snake to swing forward to get in front of the knothole. Kevin grabbed the star. 
   
All the alligators, snakes, and the Swamp Creature advanced on Kevin. Kevin threw the star at the Swamp Creature. The Swamp Creature looked surprised and disappeared. The star then bounced on three alligators, finishing them off, then to three snakes.

King Hippo (scared,yelling) Whoa! Let's get outta here! 
   
He and the Eggplant Wizard ran as the star chased them. Simon got a matador's cape out and waited by the warp. 

Simon: Toro! Toro! Oh, I mean 'Hippo! Hippo!' 
   
Hippo and Eggy dove into the warp.

Simon: Olé!

Mother Brain saw this and looked up. They fell in with some mud and landed on Mother Brain.

Mother Brain: (angry,yelling) You incompetent pukes! You've ruined everything!"
   
Later that evening, in the bayou...
    
Loafer was sitting next to a disappointed Simon with his arm around him.

Simon: This isn't fair, Your Highness. 

Lana: But I promised you dinner, Simon, and I always keep my promise. 
   
Loafer looked hungry. Simon got a full turkey and gave it to Loafer. Loafer chopped down on it. All that remained were the bones.

Lana: Thanks again for helping us out, Billy. 

Kevin: And for teaching me about the bayou. 

Billy: No,Problemo. 
   
A frog jumped onto the table. Duke was chasing it. They messed up the dishes on the table.

Kevin: I just wish I could teach Duke to stop chasing things. 
   
Duke went into a hole under a tree.

Kevin: Oh, no! Where does that warp lead to? 

Billy: That's no warp. That there's the entrance to Loafer's nest. 
   
Duke ran out as some young alligators walked after him, smiling.

Kevin: (smiling) I think Duke's finally learned his lesson. 
   
Duke jumped into Kevin's lap and covered his head with his paws, a terrified look on his face.
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Notes: I'll be going out of official air order here,so the episode "Most Dangerous Game Master" will be next.